how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Randomize
