1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Randomize
