Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
Randomize
