Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
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