You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
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