I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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