So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
There was a lot of him and a little penis
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
