So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize
