we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
