We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
When did angry sex become our thing?
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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