why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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