idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
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