There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I think people are normalizing furries
Randomize
