Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
