don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
