he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Randomize
