Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
