i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Randomize
