i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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