No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
Randomize