ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
