ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
