Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
