wat bout pragnant strippers??
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Randomize
