I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Randomize
