glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
