I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
