Can Purell be used as lube?
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Randomize
