so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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