I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I love you. Go after that dick
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
