And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Randomize
