The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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