I hate all girls vehemently.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
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