So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
i need some magic done to my vagina
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Randomize
