It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
You left your underwear on the fireplace
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Randomize
