i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
