Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Randomize
