Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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