what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
