last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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