i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Randomize
