Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Randomize
