I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
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