He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
