i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
She's not a foreskin expert like you
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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