We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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