Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
