she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
