There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
