I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
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