At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
